Jen Drunk Blogs the MTV Europe Awards

J Timberlake just came out to perform Sexy/Back. And even thought I am sick of this song, I don't think I will ever be sick of that bod. DAMN. Damn. Seems he is hosting as well. Nice. Funny an American is hosting the MTV EUROPE awards. Take that Europe! Our celebrities are prettier than yours!

Borat is beaming in via satellite from Kazakhstan to give JT some advice. Is anyone sick of Borat yet? Yeah, me either.

Oh hell yes, Rihanna is on next. I just djed 'SOS' at Beg Yr Pardon. That song is pop brilliance and the beat, obsession worthy.

Metalica's Lars Ulrich just gave Gnarls an award. Ulrich is Denmark's national hero by the way and I think he is a dick. I think Denmark, however, is amazing. I once thought that I would be very happy living there.

Moby gave best alternative act to Muse. This giving of awards has all happened in about 30 seconds by the way. America doesn't get the full awards show. MTV bastards. This show is full of cutaways.

The all new trailer trashed Killers are outside performing 'When You Were Young.' I like this song. I don't love this song. I wish I did, their debut album made up the soundtrack to my summer last year.

By the way people, it is pronounced CopenHEYgan. NOT CopenHAAgen. I understand how you would think that but no.

Diddy is dancing around pretending he is Justin Timberlake. It is not cool. He looks like an old man. I honestly think he needs to stop rapping. I never thought he was very good in the first place. Oh shit, America just cut off his performance. I love it.

Red Hot Chili Peppers just won best album. There is not a band I hate more in the world.

Kanye won best rap album. Top to bottom, his album was fantastic. His rap about not needing degrees because where did they get you, floored me when I was working day and night on my masters thesis.

Muse is performing 'Black Holes and Revelations.' The visuals are stunning. Well done Danes.

Best R&B goes to Rihanna. She is pretty but kinda ugly, lets be honest. Cute dress though.

Best group was won by Depeche Mode. Adrien Brody gave them the award.

Free Your Mind Award. I love this award. I am not being cynical about this at all. They are not giving it out this year. Instead they are giving advice on what you can do to help your fellow man. Cameron Diaz reminds us to unplug our mobiles after they are done charging. Right on Cameron.

Juliette Lewis's band is hosting the live web cast. Movie star vanity rock projects. Give me a break. 30 Seconds to Mars is the arch nemesis of all music bloggers I think.

Snoop Dog. Every 6th word is being bleeped out. Awesome.

Best Pop something was just given to Justin by somebody. No clue who those people were.

Best female to Christina by Daniel Craig and some English dude.

Justin carting around Hasselhoff cut-out around the canal. Special appearance by Rachel Dratch as crazy hoff loving Dane. Why did they fly her over for half a tick? Good on her though.

Nelly Furtado. Those fake tattoos are stupid and ugly. I bet in real life, she is cRAZy. This dance with girls in bathing suits and men in tartans doesn't make a lick of sense.

Best male went to JT. He's hot, funny and seems like a nice boy. Why shouldn't he win?

Best Rock group to The Killers given by a Kiss- like Viking.

Tenacious D tells the audience to Free Their Mind and not take a bath, take a shower.

Tell Miss Modern Age's mom. Keane is performing. Lead singer reminds me of Dudley from Harry Potter. Is it not cool taking pot shots at a former drug addict?

Best Video is someone I have no idea who it is. Someone Danish maybe. Kanye is onstage acting like a dick and bogarting their moment.

Best song, Gnarls Barkley 'Crazy.' Yeah, it's good. Yeah I like. But yeah, I am sick of it too.

Ok, so that Viking-Kiss person from before is actually some crazy Finnish band. It looks like Orks have gone and formed a metal band.